How I Self-Soothe | DBT w/ Dani lesson 1


Hey guys, welcome back. As I’ve mentioned previously, I went to a program specializing in DBT, dialectical behavioral therapy, to help with my mental illnesses.

And one of my favorite skills that was taught to us at that program is the self soothe skill.

Self soothing is exactly what it sounds like. Self care is so important, especially when you’re not in a good headspace. You can’t forget to take care of yourself.

I thought I’d share this one first as it’s a skill I don’t really need to teach and it’s useful for literally any negative emotion. It’s also a skill that’ll work for everyone. Some skills only work for certain people, but this one is just something that you should be doing anyway.

Things I Do To Self-Soothe

1. Listen to music

I actually have a “Self-Soothe” playlist, separate from my “bad day” playlist, it consists only of soft, peaceful music. Songs with lyrics that make me feel safe and warm, or lyrics that are very relatable (a lot of Ed Sheeran. A lot.) I’d suggest making a playlist specifically for self-soothing if you don’t have one already. Make sure it’s one you can listen to without an Internet connection as well, so you’ll always have it.

2. Warm shower or bath

If I have the time, a bath is often just what I need. But I’m a busy bee so a warm shower is nice too. If you’re in a bad mood, for some reason it’s very comforting to cry in a shower or bath. It feels good to get clean when you’re in these bad moods too, you can imagine that you’re washing away all the bad things, leaving the good, or cleansing the old to make way for the new.

3. Pajamas and blankets

I always get into the comfiest clothes possible (fuzzy pajamas) and wrap up in a blanket while hugging a stuffed animal. This is often when I have my music on. I let myself lie in bed, curled up, hiding from the world in a sense. It’s nice to give yourself the space to think things through and calm your mind. Especially in an environment that’s safe and comfortable.

4. Resting/ napping

Okay, most professionals will tell you that you shouldn’t sleep to avoid your problems. But for me, a nap is sometimes necessary to help me process my thoughts, or maybe to make things go away temporarily. Have you ever wished everything would just pause for a bit? Just long enough for you to calm down and process things? A nap or just allowing yourself to rest can be just that.

5. Sorting out my environment

This one may be a bit odd but it always helps me feel better to have a clean room. So if my room’s a bit of a mess, I’ll clean that up. Because I have OCD, this is often crucial for me to be able to think. If there’s a mess, I’ll never be able to calm down.

Things I’d definitely recommend doing while you self-soothe;

• turn on “do not disturb”

• ask to be left alone for a while

• do a calm activity you enjoy (not sprinting down the block, something like drawing)

• make sure you’re as comfortable as you can possibly be

That’s basically self-soothing in a nutshell. You’ll know what helps you calm down or feel relaxed, it’s just a matter of setting aside time to do it when you aren’t in the greatest mindset.

Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed. Please let me know if you’d like me to go over more DBT related things because I’d be more than happy to do that.

*Also quickly before I go! If you’re in the reader, head on over to our site because we’ve changed things up! Don’t mind our avatar, that’s the TEMPORARY work of Lyss. We have very exciting things in the works so look forward to that*

See ya soon!!!




Author: lyssndani

hey welcome to our blog! We are formally known as Alyssa and Danielle but on here you can call u Lyss and Dani. We usually blog when we can and when we do it’s usually some bullshit. But it’s our bullshit that we would love to share with you, welcome to the club!!

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